no foolin’.



just in time

glasses on

i read

i heed

the warning.

could have been


a disaster.

who would


ever imagined

that i

should not


the warning paper

that comes

stuffed into

in the

new toaster

warning me

not to toast


warning paper?

lord, what fools these mortals be!

-william shakespeare , “a midsummer night’s dream”


61 responses »

  1. Some history book I had once, and I don’t even remember if it was in high school or college, had a picture of Gerald Ford sticking a fork into a toaster. The text column beside it was about Gerald Ford in some capacity, but had absolutely nothing to do with presidents sticking forks into toasters, it just seemed that for whatever reason, the publishers arbitrarily chose that picture to use in their book. The caption read, simply “Gerald R. Ford 38th president of the United States.” (I’m pretty sure I meant for this comment to make you feel better.)

    Liked by 1 person

  2. There’s so much crap that has to be removed from the stuff we buy before we can use it. I always wondered how many people don’t think to peel that label off of their new digital alarm clock, and wonder why the clock seems to have stopped at 12:08….

    Liked by 2 people

  3. .Ha! That is funny Beth. I have some experience with this sort of corporate group think and I’ll bet that the warning once had some other important info on it which was removed over the years, but the warning card never was.removed because it wan’t anybody’s job to do it/ Ha! I was the Safety Director of a tanker company for while and the drivers had all sorts of apparently useless paperwork. They actually had a form on which they had to list the other forms, there were so many. I traced all this stuff to see where it went and who used it and found that it was just filed. I contacted the authorities to make sure they had no requirement for it and they didn’t. So, I started removing paperwork by simply refusing to reorder the books of forms. You would not believe the complaints I got from the drivers up to the owner of the company. They were adamant that they had filled out these forms for years and thye wanted to continue. Ha! I wouldn’t give them their forms. It saved hours per week for each driver and after a while the rumbling died down.

    The moral of the story is that warning card was likely instituted when toasters were devices that you opened up and inserted the bread – and no one ever saw it as their job to removie it.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. One reaction to this priceless experience of yours, the new toaster … that hopefully works much better than the common sense of those who decided to put a paper message INSIDE THE TOASTER: speechless, writeless … I knew I wanted to comment, but I didn’t have the words, initially. Shakespeare’s quote, at the end, speaks into this farce far better than what I could ever do. Hey, have a really, really, good new year.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I don’t think Domingo realized that Gerald Ford is a MIchigan man, Beth, when he tried to bring you solace with that fork in the toaster story. I think maybe one of Gerald’s aide’s said, Mr. President, that bill is finished, you can stick a fork in it, when the President was next to the toaster. That’s all.

    Why did the company put the paper in the toaster, I agree, Beth, is the quesiton of the day. Yeesh.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Ever since the lawsuit over the scalding hot coffee from McDonald’s, everyone’s being super cautious. Here’s one warning I hope you’ll heed: Don’t forget to look for those clever photos and quotes that tickle our fancy. Happy 2015, Beth. πŸ˜‰

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Oh this is too weird!!! We got a new toaster LAST Christmas and the dam warning was on the inside at the bottom of the toaster!! Didn’t notice it until I put my bagel into the slot!!!! Ended up being another “Lucie Story”, what can I say??!! :)P

    Liked by 1 person

  8. the blame culture and lawyer-driven frenzy in the US to turn every ‘accident’ into a money-earning opportunity has made companies paranoid about the risks of litigation, and resulted in some ludicrous over-the-top health and safety precautions

    Liked by 1 person

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