after a long while

and a lot of swedish kaffe

i made it

 through 

the ikea rat maze

but not before gathering

as usual

all kinds of ‘domgjingos’

and other unexplained things along the way

along with the one item I set out to buy.

I was feeling victorious

when things took a turn.

 I left my cart at the end of an aisle

to get a closer look

at an exciting ‘grushlbonker’ of some sort

and my cart went missing.

I first thought that maybe I had misplaced it.

no luck.

I then looked for someone ahead of me

who may have mistakenly grabbed the wrong cart. 

still no luck. 

I watched for someone to suddenly do an about face

and hurriedly return with the wrong cart in hand

a bit embarrassed and mumbling an apology.

still no luck. 

maybe it was my giant blue used $1.49 bag

I had in there that was so appealing?

what could anyone else possibly

find any use for, or value

in the odd collection of things I’d snagged along the way?

I couldn’t even remember most of what I had in there

but now I felt I needed each of them for some reason

and was somehow missing them.

I decided to consider it a small gift to the universe

someone must have needed it all more than me.

I hadn’t paid for anything yet

so no loss

other than time and energy

and of course

that fancy blue bag

but most of all

I had no desire to rerun the maze

 so I grabbed a few new things

I didn’t know that I needed 

along the route to the register.

and threw in

a shiny new blue bag 

along with

a 6-pack of cinnamon rolls

just for good measure.

—

“why would anyone steal a shopping cart? it’s like stealing a two year old.”

-erma bombeck