Tag Archives: store

bogo.

Standard

looks like it’s buy one, get one free day.

i’ll take two. 

“i have enough money to last me the rest of my life unless I buy something.”

-jackie mason 

Advertisements

dollar for dollar.

Standard

when one local dollar tree store closed

my favorite enthusiastic manager

moved to the new location

and judging by my recent visit

he has not lost one bit

of his dollar store fervor and expertise.

this was a conversation between bob (the manager) and evelyn (my cashier) as i was checking out:

E: “bob, you’re really good at remembering all of the balloon numbers to ring up and knowing each one of them without looking.”

B: “well, i’ve been doing it a long time. once in a while a number will change or a new shape will come in, like a unicorn, but it’s part of my job to keep up with it.”

E: “when i worked at the grocery store, i knew all the prices for the cucumbers, the peppers and tomatoes. the easy ones”

B: “some are trickier, like avocados, and for some of those things you only see sometimes it’s harder to remember the all the plu’s.”

E: “it’s really a skill, bob. to be able to do that.”

customer john interrupts:

J: “hey bob – so this is where you’ve got up to – how are you liking the change?”

B: “hey, john. good to see you. it’s great. every day is great. i’m so lucky to be here.”

and how lucky is dollar tree to have bob as a manager?

a man who truly loves his job

 takes pride in all of it

is always smiling and helpful

knows exactly where every item in the store is located

and who happily learns the number for the new unicorn balloon.

50% shades of grey.

Standard

IMG_0618

more proof

that fame is fleeting

the

50 shades of grey

love ring

is on the

clearance shelf

second one down

black box

once so hot

now

with luster lost

jammed between

the expired

mucinex

preparation h

metamucil

nicotine gum

bath puffs

baby meds

mouthwash

all there

to improve

the

imperfections

of the

human condition

what

strange company.

I’m surfing the giant life wave. – William Shatner

Standard

Image

“Remember that when you think you are seeing giants, they may not be giants at all; perhaps it is you who is the dwarf.”

C. JoyBell C.

 and yet another true story, of path-crossing, and timing, and luck, and circumstance. i was on my way to school for a faculty work day, and walked into a huge multi-purpose all-things-you-could-ever-want-and more store, (air compressors, makeup, yarn, chicken tenders, cabbage, towels, scotch, and goldfish – all sold there), and i went to get a cart.

as i pulled my cart out of the corral, i turned and was stopped in my tracks because –

i saw a giant.

literally.

his hands were huge and he stood right in front of me, manning his cart, ready to head off into the aisles, in search of whatever diverse collection of items he may on the hunt for. and everything about him was huge. stunningly massive.

my eyes slowly looked up, and up, and just kept going. and going. he was the tallest man i’ve ever seen close up, other than a basketball player, but he was not built anything like a basketball player, he was built like an oak tree- huge, and solid, and unbending.

i was in awe of his physical presence and as i kept looking up and looked up finally got to his face, he smiled at me with a huge giant’s grin. i smiled back, he seemed so gentle,  not scary at all, as i had always imagined a giant would be if i ever encountered one. and we headed off through the aisles, each on our own retail scavenger hunt.

Image

when i got to the grocery section of this massive store that is a like small city, i turned the corner from the cereal aisle, and who should i encounter –

but a second giant!

again, another surprised reaction from me, but i just took it in, and wondered about the odds of finding two men of this ilk, in the same building at the same time. i thought perhaps there was some kind of convention or fest going on in the area, that both may have attended. sort of specialized, like a ‘mothers of twins’ event, but for really, really, really big people.

i finished my shopping, not crossing paths with either of them again, and went on to school. i sat through the professional development meetings, but could not shake the memory of these men. i tried to imagine what a day spent as a giant must be like, how it must be to always have people surprised by encountering them, wondering if people were kind or cruel to them, and wondering what kind of items a giant shops for.

at lunch that day, i sat with one of our phys ed teachers and told him about my stop at the store on the way to school. he got a very surprised look on his face, asked me if i was kidding, and told me he was shocked that i brought this up because he had also run into a giant at another location of the same store across town, that very same morning. it was a surprising encounter for him as well, and he’d taken a picture of his giant because he didn’t think anyone would believe him. he shared the picture on his phone with me, and it was yet another giant that i had not met.

what are the odds of this set of circumstances? that we would each encounter one or more giants on the same morning, in the same brand of store, in different locations, on different sides of town, that he had taken a picture, and that we actually had lunch together, and it would come up in our conversation?

it raised so many questions. why so many giants in one state at one time? why at this chain of stores? did they offer a giants’ discount, like they did for senior citizens each tuesday? or did the giants feel comfortable there because the store itself was so giant? how did the universe conspire to have us all cross paths on the same day and then have the two of us cross paths to share our stories and be amazed by it all?

we will never know the answers to any of these questions, but it was a huge day for all of us.

Definition of giant in English:

NOUN

an imaginary or mythical being of human form but superhuman size.

an abnormally tall or large person, animal, or plant.

a person of exceptional talent or qualities: a giant among sportsmen

Astronomy a star of relatively great size and luminosity compared to ordinary stars of the main sequence, and 10-100 times the diameter of the sun. 

 Image

“Well, first of all,” said the BFG, “human beans is not really believing in giants, is they? Human beans is not thinking we exist.”

― Roald DahlThe BFG

————————————————————————————————-

credits: library of congress,  roald dahl, the bfg (the big, friendly, giant), quentin blake, harper collins publishing, oxford dictionary