Tag Archives: friends

s’endormir.

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(not me, but if i was a bearded male,

with a cup of espresso, a croissant, and a typewriter instead of a laptop,

this could have been me,

so – very similar to my situation with a few tweaks. )

late last night (probably around 9 or so)

soon to fall asleep

at the comforting lake house of my friends

about to write and post my blog for the morning

a couple of friends

saw that i was still slightly awake

so why not sit down

 have great chat for a couple of hours

 when i finally closed my eyes while talking

we decided to call it a night

so just a few more minutes typing away

to tuck tomorrow’s post in for the night

and when i woke up it was morning and my fingers had fallen off of my laptop and my laptop had fallen on the floor and a fellow blogger reached out to ask if i was okay as there was no post so i quickly set up the post i had meant to finish the night before and balance was restored.

“if you want to talk about someone falling asleep,

whether in their bed, in a car, at a desk, while reading a blog post about french grammar,

you would use s’endormir.”

-frenchtogether.com

names.

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not me sitting with my three daughters

but hired meercat models looking very similar

after i’ve just called each of them by one or more of their sibling’s names once again

since for some reason i thought it was a good idea to name all of them with the same first letter 

(i’m a fan of alliteration)

and with two syllables

and rarely have called them by the correct name on the first try since birth

so they each pretty much answer to all of them. 

According to Quartz Magazine, if you’re in a particularly bad mood, getting called by your sibling’s name might make you feel like the offending parent doesn’t care enough to keep their kids straight. But according to a 2016 study published in the journal Memory and Cognition, your parents might actually mistake you for your siblings because they care about you.

A team of students in Duke University’s Department of Psychology and Neuroscience conducted a series of surveys to find out who gets misnamed, who misnames them, and why it happens. Some instances appeared to have been caused by phonetic similarities between names—e.g. you accidentally called your boss “Katherine” (your cousin’s name) instead of “Kathleen.” But the survey results also pointed to strong semantic trends. In other words, family members are often called other family members’ names, friends are often called other friends’ names, and people outside those two categories are often mistaken for other people outside them.

Basically, as the researchers explained, we build semantic networks in our brains where we can group similar information together and recall it easily. Facts about your immediate family members, for example, may be stored in one semantic network; while details about friends might go in another one. In your mom’s mind, then, your and your sister’s names are essentially in the same basket, and your mom might unwittingly grab your sister’s when she meant to grab yours. What the researchers argue is that it’s a little less about the mistake and more about the basket: Parents love their kids, so they put you all in the same top-tier basket.

The results also suggest that some family member baskets aren’t just reserved for humans. A staggering 41 of the 42 pet-related misnaming incidents involved calling pets by family members’ names or vice versa, rather than mixing up two pets’ names. And most of those incidents involved dogs, specifically.

“Given the scarcity of misnaming episodes involving the names of family pets other than dogs, our data suggest that dogs may be a central part of (at least some) families … as human-like members, whereas cats and other pets, although they may be part of the family, are not categorized as human-like,” the authors wrote in the study.

If you’re about to get defensive on behalf of your cat, whom you very much consider a human-like part of your family, keep in mind that 42 is a small sample size. And the whole study only included about 1700 participants, who were all reporting misnaming episodes remembered from their past—leaving plenty of room for human error. In short, as is so often the case with scientific studies, more research is needed. That said, try not to take it personally if your dad mistakes you for the dog.

 

“i cannot tell what the dickens his name is.”

-william shakespeare

Story credits: Quartz Magazine -By Samantha A. Deffler, Christin M. Ogle, Cassidy Fox, and David C. Rubin

Current and former members of the Noetics Laboratory at Duke University

coffee talk.

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nothing like a bit of coffee talk between friends

to restore your balance and make for a great day. 

 

 

“as long as there was coffee in the world, how bad could things be?”

-cassandra clare, City of Ashes

 

 

 

 

art credit: ryan conners, painting, midsommer 2019, cat art

tell their stories.

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after sledding on a beautiful snow day

grandies and neighbors

gather around the table

to share a large pot

of ramen, laughs, and stories. 

“honor the community you come from. tell their stories.”

-sting

 

mini.

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I love this gift

of my very own mini bar

from my very-long-time-big-hearted friends

it fits perfectly into la casita

and so do they.

 

“it is the small things in life which count;

it is the inconsequential leak

which empties the biggest reservoir.”

*charles comiskey

*Charles Comiskey  (1859 – 1931), also nicknamed “Commy” or “The Old Roman”, was an American Major League Baseball player, manager and team owner. He was a key person in the formation of the American League, and was also founding owner of the Chicago White Sox.

losing it.

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(not me, a reenactor, but we do have similar pj’s and hair)

many moons ago

when i lived a very busy life

single-mother, college, 2 jobs

I had family and friends over

to celebrate my daughter’s graduation.

the day started early

 somehow everything came together

the party went well

my divorced parents got along

none of the food burnt

the cake turned out

everyone was pretty happy.

as the day wound down

there were just a couple of guests left

who wanted to stay to watch

the very end of a championship basketball game 

we expected it would wrap up very quickly.

what are the odds 

it broke records and went into triple overtime?

at a certain point

I could no longer stay awake

and tried the usual methods to end the day

yawning, cleaning up, sighing, talking about tomorrow

finally it was so bad

that I put my pajamas on and laid down on the floor

 the game continued

 the guests continued

at last there was a win and we said our goodbyes. 

the next day,

I woke up went to work,

went to my class,

went to my other job

where my friend thanked me for a nice party.

I went on and on about how exhausted I was

due in part to these late guests

who just did not get the hint

that I needed to sleep

no matter what I said or did.

she nodded sympathetically

as I dramatically reenacted the entire end of the night

she listened quietly

until I finally had it out of my system and was done

and then she said,

“beth, that was us.”

epilogue:

we still are good friends and continue to laugh about it all these years later. 

 I am still not a good late-nighter and have a foggy memory.

“the guest who outstays his fellow guests loses his overcoat.”

~ chinese proverb 

 

 

 

 

 

image credit: littlejayz/huffington post