Tag Archives: humor

a tribute to your individuality – neighborhood style.

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i am endlessly fascinated by the postings i find on my neighborhood nextdoor site:

the one about the wild turkeys holding a woman at bay in her driveway

then her warning to others, after she escaped unscathed to the car,

as she last saw them headed down the road looking for other victims like a street gang

the one complaining about kids running through his yard instead of staying on the path 

 the one who reported the tiny pet turtle who ‘ran’ away from her yard

and on and on. 

then there was my favorite:

it was a long chat chain that began when someone relocated here from the uk and was looking for a store that sold weet bix. the response/comment section continued on for months, with neighbors offering suggestions of where to find different flavors and sizes of it, who had the best prices, adding in images of artwork made with weet bix, weet bix jokes, weet bix gifs, weet bix logo clothing, balanced towers of weet bix, opinions about weet bix, bowls of weet bix, people sharing their u.k. memories……it was absolutely brilliant, and even included a site administrator who couldn’t take it anymore, trying to wind it up at one point, summarizing it by listing the previously suggested stores, only to have it start up again, people telling her just stop reading it if she was over it, but they were having a ball, leading to it win our ‘best post of the year,’ due to it’s refusal to end, and for the enthusiasm level with which the neighborhood embraced this, rising to the occasion in this ongoing quest to find and celebrate everything weet bix. i loved it. (in the spirit of the chat chain, this may be the longest run-on sentence/paragraph/rambling explanation ever)

happy national neighbor day

“the curiosity of the neighbors about you, is a tribute to your individuality, and you should encourage it. ”    

-quentin crisp

wrong crowd.

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somebody didn’t listen to their mother

and 

‘got in with the wrong crowd.’

“it’s a dangerous business, frodo, going out your door.

you step onto the road,

and if you don’t keep your feet,

there’s not knowing where you might be swept off to.”

j.r.r. tolkien, The Lord of the Rings–

teriyaki time.

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teriyaki time (not for gambling)

the bag of loot my daughter gave me

with a friendly reminder

to pick up the sushi lunch

and not go to the casino or track

with the cash and the kids.

 

Quote from ‘Dumb & Dumber’:

LLOYD: “I’ll bet you 20 bucks I can get you gambling before the end of the day!?”

HARRY: “No way.”

LLOYD: “I’ll give you 3 to 1 odds?”

HARRY: “Nope.”

LLOYD: “5 to 1?”

HARRY: “Nope.”

LLOYD: “10 to 1?”

HARRY: “You’re on.”

attention.

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i get the feeling olive is in need of a bit more attention from me.

above, olive tries to add herself

into the frida self-portrait puzzle

disguising herself

as the 4th animal in the picture

a bird, a monkey, and now,

2 black cats instead of 1.

below, olive tries to add herself

into a cable news show

disguising herself

as the special guest co-host.

just a hunch. 

 

“give whatever you are doing and whoever you are with the gift of your attention.”

-jim rohn

essential.

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(not me or my shoes, but she wore them well and they were clearly essential)

way back in march

when quarantine suddenly began

for some reason

the first things i immediately ordered were

a cherry blossom doormat and a pair of glittery shoes

(both are always good to have on hand during a pandemic)

the mat arrived quickly and is happily living outside my door

the shoes however have not yet made their way to my door

as it was determined that they are ‘non-essential’

and therefore will be delivered sometime late in june

one woman’s essential is another’s folly

all a matter of perspective.

“the first essential, of course, is to know what you want.”

Robert Collier

 

 

image credit: MGM, The Wizard of Oz

primavera.

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watched a live cooking lesson

with chef isabella

working from her home kitchen

making pasta primavera

she’s italian, passionate, spirited, direct

naturally hysterical

i learned some techniques

as well as

her recipe, hand gestures, italian numbers, and lots of improv skills

at one point in the lesson

part of her burner broke

she just cursed and moved to another

there was a live feed for the 500 of us who were watching

at one point, her husband, pazzo, who was helping

made his own funny comment to the viewers on the feed

pazzo to everyone:

“omg, lmao. $100 says that stove is gone when the quarantine is over…if not sooner!”

no wonder they are married

no wonder it was all so fun

no wonder i’m going to make pasta primavera

brilliant, every minute.

“i’m not sure I’d write a good cookbook, but I might make a good cooking show.”

-christopher walken

both.

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both thoughtful and wonderful gifts

both ways to mark my days

both things i like

whimsical animals

whimsical heroes

which to choose

easy decision

both. 

it’s always good to get a second opinion about what day it is. 

think victor hugo would be proud of my skills. 

“concision in style, precision in thought, decision in life.”     

-victor hugo

warning.

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“Do not  aim at eyes or face. Do not use projectiles other than those supplied or recommended by the manufacturer. Do not fire at point blank range. Do not use these toys against any living things. Never point or shoot the projectiles at anyone or pets.”

” ADULT SUPERVISION REQUIRED.”

the warning on this frisbee

was clearly written by someone

who had grown up with a younger sibling. 

“it could be that the purpose of your life is only to serve as a warning to others.”

-ashleigh brilliant

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