Tag Archives: humor

bogo.

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looks like it’s buy one, get one free day.

i’ll take two. 

“i have enough money to last me the rest of my life unless I buy something.”

-jackie mason 

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the math and science of oreos.

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“researchers in the u.k. have developed

a vegetable called ‘super broccoli’

designed to fight heart disease.

not to be outdone,

researchers in america have developed

a way to stuff an oreo inside of another oreo.”

-jimmy fallon

 

on the road to mastery.

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i asked two of the grandies

to go bike riding with me

but to have mercy

go easy on me

i haven’t been on a bike in two years

they are great riders

mountain bikers, road bikers, hill jumpers

all i wanted was to get my bike legs back

by starting on a flat surface

they were patient

told me some roads looked tricky

but i’d be okay

along the way they challenged me

and asked me if i could ride

using just 3 limbs, 2 limbs, 1 limb, no limbs?

(no to all)

with 4 limbs, a few minor crashes, tight turns,

near misses, and less than perfect balance

i survived the ride

and rode the next couple of days with them

each day i got a little sorer

but the ride got a little easier

they figured i’d get better by the end of the month

when i asked how they’d rate me as a rider

they told me that i began on the ‘terrible’ level

and had moved up to the ‘almost moderate’ level.

 i took that to mean

‘almost mastery’ level.

“she who succeeds in gaining the mastery of the bicycle will gain the mastery of life.”

-susan b. anthony

 

germ.

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spent time in my classroom

doing some pre-planning with my team

and saw how thorough

our summer cleaning crew had been.

i especially loved the note they left on the chairs:

they did not merely say

‘chairs cleaned’

but instead they kicked it up a notch to an ’11’

 the ‘disinfected’ level

for the kinders’ chairs.

i can certainly appreciate that.

“growth itself contains the germ of happiness.”

-pearl s. buck

where hobbies, hijinks, and capers go bad = my childhood #5

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while many kids of my era ate glue, paste, chalk, and crayons

i was busy with my own unusual eating habits

because we played outside for hours and hours

in the fields and open spaces of our neighborhood

most every day

i supplemented by ‘indoor diet’

with my own outdoor natural food diet

often consisting of:

pulp from a freshly fallen tree stump

rich, black, loamy soil

and baby ants.

not sure why i was drawn to each of these things

or why or how i stayed healthy

must have been all of the snow i ate in the winter months

but i’ve learned not to eat baby ants

and i’ve since moved on to chocolate, pasta, and flamin’ hot cheetos

 apparently i was one of the original clean eaters

quite by accident.

 

 

“eat food. not too much. mostly plants.”

-michael pollan -‘in defense of food: an eater’s manifesto’

 

uphill.

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ann arbor art fair is coming today.

bring it!

“it is easier to go down a hill than up, but the view is from the top.”

-arnold bennett

 

photo credit: ann arbor/scio hill- 1980s,*eck stanger-ann arbor news, aadl archives, ann arbor townies

*Eck Stanger, chief photographer for the Ann Arbor News for 40 years, landed the job because he was the only News employee able to read the German instructions for his secondhand Speed Graphic camera. Or so the legend goes. Over the course of his four decades as photographer – and the News’ sole photographer during its first 12 years–“one-shot Stanger,” as he came to be known–captured famous statesmen, princes, and presidents, as well as eminent artists, musicians, scientists, and athletes. But he spent most of his time capturing everyday Ann Arborites with skill and a keen eye.