Tag Archives: humor

back and center.


in the last 15 minutes of my weights/strength class

a hybrid mix of

 people in the gym


 people at home

someone felt compelled

to become the new center of attention

by jumping on the equipment

right behind the trainer

who was teaching live

she did not appear to be thrilled

with his spontaneous performance

but i did workout my abs with such a good laugh.

“i don’t like to be center of attention, except for when I want to be the center of attention.”

-trisha paytas



when coming home

not only did i find the pinata’s footprint

but also the foot.

this has all the makings of an organized hit

it’s a working crime scene at the moment.

Jefe : I have put many beautiful pinatas in the storeroom, each of them filled with little surprises.

El Guapo : Many pinatas?

Jefe : Oh yes, many!

El Guapo : Would you say I have a plethora of pinatas?

Jefe : A what?

El Guapo : A *plethora*.

Jefe : Oh yes, you have a plethora.

-From the 1986 film, The Three Amigos:



the photo on the left illustrates my reaction

when running into someone that i’ve met before

and its awkward because i cannot, for the life of me

remember their name

and i just have to say

“great to see you again’

and if i ever have to introduce them to someone else

i just have to introduce the person with me instead

 hoping they’ll pick up the cue and respond with their own name.

for 3 years i called one of my old neighbors ‘phil’

 until another neighbor said

“i don’t know who you’re talking about, do you mean, al?”

“yes, as a matter of fact, i think i do.”


my new perfect word of the day –

‘tartle’ (verb, scots)

(to hesitate while introducing or meeting someone because you have forgotten their name)



waiting for the kids again and yet again

his day jobs

are driving the fire truck and acting in movies

but when the weekend comes

he’s manning the wheel of the minivan

doing errands and chauffeuring the pups around

to all their social events and games

just like every other dalmation.

“i’m the one with the spots.”

-anonymous dalmatian author


in the wild.





imagine my delight

 when discovering this spring baby giraffe 

in the woods near my home

i had no idea that they were native to michigan.


“however much you know giraffes, to see one in the wild for the first time feels prehistoric.”

-jane goodall



completely pointless.


(painting of a talented model who is not me,

but could be a close match

if i only knew how to play the piano, read music, and was cheeky monkey.)

sunday is my very favorite day for doing something pointless or absolutely nothing.

“weekends don’t count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless.”
— bill watterson


art credit: litus gallery

lose your head.


a cinco de mayo

public service motivational reminder:

some days you just lose your head.

(but there’s always at least one mini tootsie roll still up in there)


“it’s a lot easier to lose your head than to keep it.”

– suzanne collins



olive, who is far from a gym rat

watches the instructor intently

  she may be considering asking me to be her home training partner

i’m going to have to step up my game.

“friends that sweat together stay together.”

– wayze

*fork over.


why is it

that within 5 seconds and 2 steps

when carrying a plate with a fork on it

that the fork somehow slams to the ground

even when i’m focused, keeping the plate level, moving at a normal pace

is it math? science? is my body always a just a bit a-kilter?

*in reading about what dropping a fork means, all i that i can find are superstitions.

after looking at superstitions from around the globe, from a variety of cultures, both historical and current

many disagree about what will happen when you drop a fork

but they seem to be narrowed down to three major things that will happen soon:

good news, bad news, or love.

this explains a lot of my life.,

but why the fork falls remains a mystery.

“if they drop a fork, you give them another one”

– from ‘caddyshack’