Oct22

malfeasance?

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A British chestnut-whacking champion was cleared Monday of cheating after an investigation into alleged malfeasance at the World Conker Championships.

Organizers of the nutty annual event said that Dave Jakins, a veteran competitor nicknamed “King Conker,” did not use a steel chestnut to conquer his rival.

The traditional game, played by generations of British schoolchildren, involves players using conkers — the glossy brown seeds of the horse chestnut tree — threaded onto a string to try and smash their opponent’s chestnut.

More than 200 conkers enthusiasts entered the annual competition in the village of Southwick in central England earlier this month. Jakins, 82, won the men’s tournament. But organizers launched an investigation after claims that he might have used a steel chestnut that was in his pocket.

Investigators said they studied film and photo evidence and took testimony from judges and umpires, and concluded that “it would be near impossible for Mr. Jakins to have swapped the conkers unnoticed.”

Organizers said they accepted Jakins’ claim “that he had had the (steel) conker to amuse people and as part of his role as ‘King Conker,’” and had used a real chestnut in the contest.

Organizers also said the losing finalist, Alastair Johnson-Ferguson, had “accepted defeat with good grace and sportsmanship,” after media reports that he had made the cheating allegation.

The overall title of World Conker Champion was won by Kelci Banschbach, originally from Indianapolis. The 34-year-old was crowned “queen conker” after beating Jakins in the final. She was the first American to win the title since the World Conker Championships began in 1965.

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“this malfeasance must be stopped,” said flora in a deep and superheroic voice.”

-kate dicamillo,’flora and ulysses’

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malfeasance

   noun

law, specialized

 /mælˈfiː.zəns/ uk 

an example of dishonest and illegal behavior, especially by a person in authority
-cambridge dictionary

 

 

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source credits: abc news, ap

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58 responses »

  3. When I was at junior school, conker seasom was much anticipated. We tried many ways to harden our best conkers, whether soaking them in vinegar, or lightly baking them in the oven. If one conker survived six bouts against others,. it was then called a ‘sixer’, and often saved as a trophy. The latest steel conker scandal was headline news here! (By the way, we also collect them to discourage spiders from coming into the house, placing them on window ledges and in the corners of rooms.)
    Best wishes, Pete.

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  13. Thanks for introducing me to the World Conker Championship — and to the controversy over this year’s competition. I’m glad the issue was sorted out!

    Also, a post with a Kate DiCamillo quote is a joy. Her books are magical 🌞

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  14. We had chestnut trees growing up, made a necklace out of them but no Conker – never heard of it til today!
    A few weeks ago a squirrel stashed some green (outer coat) chestnuts in my flower pots.
    Then they were gone. Thought they had chosen a more secure spot to hide for winter feasting
    BUT
    – Maybe Not –
    Maybe they made Conkers to beat up anyone coming into their territory and trying to steal their stashes?

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  15. Now that is news we need to know! I remember hearing about conkers a few years ago – they are not popular here in Canada (as far as I know!) There is a horse chestnut tree that I encounter on my walk but it doesn’t flower, so doesn’t make conkers either. Hmmm… shall have to investigate!

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  20. I grew up playing conkers! We had ways of cheating like soaking then in vinegar to make them unbreakable. Sometimes they passed the sniff test, sometimes they didn’t! Later in life when I had a village pub, I held an annual competion in the garden. Kids these days are discouraged from plaining conkers without wearing goggles thanks to those health and safety spoilsports!

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