you never know when you’ll need one
good to have it marked.
—
‘but the good news, the crime rate is down. isn’t that amazing?
less banks are being robbed. well, sure.
A, there’s less banks. B, the banks don’t have any money left.
And C, nobody’s got gas money for the getaway car.
so, right there, crime is down!’
-jay leno
love my car
it sends me caring messages
hello, goodbye, check your backseat, be safe…
and now this one:
(no) /eyesight
it felt a bit judge-y
i’m wearing my glasses!
until I realized it meant
my backup camera was covered with road salt
and not able to see.
still feels judge-y.
—
driving home next to a lit-up christmas car
way deep in the holiday spirit
is that santa
out for a night on the town?
—
‘following the well-lit path, offers little in the way of magic.’
-seth godin
when you get this message from your car
you have startle response
turn around very carefully
and see this
ah, just another pinata
clearly my car doesn’t know me well enough yet.
i was picturing one of those scary old tales
we used to terrorize each other with
it would be either a guy with a hook
or a pumpkin head with no body.
—
look out! behind you!
-ralph waldo emerson
my ‘new to me’ car is here
its color makes me happy
my favorite, green
i’m naming it matcha
just like the color of the beautiful tea.
little smaller and little sportier than my last car
feels like a perfect fit.
—
‘green is the prime color of the world, and that from which its loveliness arises.’
-pedro calderon de la barca
—
ah, sylvia the silver subaru
sayonara and thank you
for the many, many, many miles without worry
now in the hands of a happy young souzaphone player
and many more miles to go.
—
‘are you just a car salesman or are you a poet too? i’ve never been accused of poetry before.’
-robert charles wilson, american-canadian sci-fi writer
not sure i would have wanted this in my car
the wrist-twist isn’t my thing
i would have preferred
one of those big old round steering wheels
you could turn with one hand
but the hair is amazing
like judy jetson
in the cockpit
piloting a speeding jet
can’t say that i’m totally surprised
this concept never got off the ground.
—
Ford introduced the “Wrist-Twist” steering system for cars in 1965. Despite better visibility, a roomier cabin and allowing you to drive with your arms on armrests it never went beyond the testing stage. You can see a two-minute promotional film here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PWWYkxQCFfQ
—
source credits: ford motor company, midcentury fashion
inside my car at the car wash
music on
relaxing
feeling that underwater seaweed or giant squid on my hood vibe
yet the highlight
is getting to the end
seeing the ‘theme’ setup in a corner –
captain’s wheel, the bluest water, navigation devices
understanding why it is called
‘the lighthouse’
performance art at its finest and my clean car is merely a bonus
it’s really an immersive sensory art experience on the cheap.
—
“told you. everything sounds better in a car wash.”
-sarah dessen
when having snow tires put on my car
had an early appointment
brought my laptop and a giant coffee
to settle in for an hour and a half or so.
while waiting
i planned to write and read and catch up on things
knowing there is always something going on
with any group of fellow ‘waiters.’
i sat at a high table to make for easy typing
most everyone else sat in the lower, more comfortable chairs
quite soon after my arrival, the ambiance changed.
on the left side in front of me
a woman sat down
in the seat next to the remote control for the tv
meant to help the time pass, amuse, and distract everyone.
she immediately took control of the controller
switching whatever channel had been on
to fox news.
the woman in the family to my right
politely asked if she would mind changing
the channel from fox to something else.
she said yes and all good
in no time
we were all watching baywatch reruns
in high def, on the big screen, 90s music pumping
those red bathing suited beauties
running on the beach, boating, emoting, doing pull-ups, rescues, looking hot, and whatnot
and david hasselhoff, the hoff.
the workers at the tire store desk were mesmerized
some young enough to never have seen it before
some old enough to have had the poster and remembering.
i refilled my coffee
the channel was not changed again
throughout my entire (now 2 hour), wait.
new customers coming in had mixed reactions
what an early holiday surprise!
“of all men’s miseries the bitterest is this: to know so much and to have control over nothing.”
-herodotus
I didn't have my glasses on.... 