what has 4 wheels and writes?





i am fascinated, time and again, by my garbagemen. they’ve taken on the role of old-school catholic nuns – strict with their rules, calling me out in front of everyone, and trying to teach me using a tough love approach, though they use ink rather than chalk as their medium of choice, and rap my knuckles with pens rather than wooden rulers.  


i am always amazed, that for some reason, there are times when they see fit to stop on their route and write me a note, leaving sticky notes on top of my bins. these notes tell me what i’ve done wrong: bins too close together, wrong item in the wrong bin, green bin to the left of the blue bin, trash not in alphabetical order, and god knows what else, a myriad of my garbage sins.   

i find it hilarious that they will take the time to stop and write me these notes rather than just moving a bin over 8.5 inches if need be, taking the trash, and going on with their day. no, instead, they leave it full and with a note atop, promising to be back the next week at the appointed hour to attempt to pick it up again, when my mistake has been corrected. i imagine, at that point they figure i will have done my penance and they will have forgiven me my sins and they are willing and able help me to dispose of my trash, so that i can start anew with a clean slate once again. these guys are all forgiving and have no limit to trying to teach me to do better, and i plan to give them a lovely pen set for christmas this year. 


 I lived through the garbage. I might as well dine on the caviar . Beverly Sills


48 responses »

  1. Haha!

    No way…I thought it was just me! Lol

    I’ve been in this house for 4 weeks now and had 2 stickers. LMAO

    One was because the bin was too far from the road. I totally disagree, assuming no one moved when I went to sleep. I now live on a main road, so it is possible. ( brat kids) 🙂
    This week was about putting my dust from the vacuum cleaner in a plastic bag as the dust went into the environment. Seriously, I live alone now and the vacuum bag wasn’t even quarter full. Where I live your supposed to throw everything in the one bin and not use too many plastic bags! Make up your minds bin men?? Lol

    I feel your pain! 🙂 hugs Paula xxx


  2. Yes I know exactly what you mean and it must be a universal plan as it is happening where I live too, next they will be wanting us to empty our own bins and write notes to ourselves 🙂 Yes I have come to the conclusion that they are nothing but downright interfering nobodies with half a brain and the knowledge of a farting goat, well either that or the world has gone mad 😦

    Hey don’t be naughty again or your bin will be left out of the weekly cycle indefinitely 😦 lol

    Andro xx


      • Naughty is good, I should know as I am the worst naughtiest bad ass, nooo not really, actually I am just a nice sort of guy, but still crackers nonetheless 🙂

        Have fun tonight, I always do 😉

        Andro xx


  3. a wooden ruler ?

    you were lucky !

    my teacher at primary school carried a yard long wooden blackboard pointer stick and thought the best way to discourage me from writing with my left hand rather than my right was to rap my knuckles with her pointer whenever she caught me writing with the ‘wrong’ hand

    Gggrrrrr !


  4. I liked the quote from Beverly Sills, my Mom always loved the formal singers like she does opera. I think it is hilarious that your garbage men leave you notes! Trying to teach you how to discard things.


  5. Yikes! Your garbageman makes mine look like a saint. My guy always greets me with a smile. He even waves at my four year old son. Maybe I should get him a gift for Christmas, too?


  6. Ok so you really have to have bins in an order? Omg I can see your frustration, see I’d be forgetting there Chrissie present full stop. Paper men – garbage men – the postal episode, you poor love..hows the milkman? 🙂 x


  7. Leave them a note in return –

    “Hey fellas, I’m going to surprise you today and arrange my bins, separate the trash and even help you load up —- while you take a coffee break and discuss Tolstoy.”


  8. I think you should beat them to the punch and start leaving sticky notes for THEM! Examples: Hope you have a fabulously wonderful morning; One man’s trash is another man’s treasure; Garbage in, garbage out; etc. I’m sure you can think of many more.
    You might also leave a note asking if they ever dance like the people in ‘Stomp’ during their off hours.


  9. OMG so funny! I think we have the same garbage men! I, too, have experienced that “walk of shame” as my neighbor puts it, when the garbage men refuse to take the garbage we set out, as punishment for some transgression unknown to us (until we read the handy sticky note)! I always picture the neighbors looking out their windows, tsk tsking & thinking, “Well maybe they’ll learn from this & try a little harder next time”


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