Slip sliding away, slip sliding away – You know the nearer your destination, the more you slip sliding away  – paul simon

and yes, it’s another polar vortex day at home, and yes, i have yet another personal tale of slip sliding away. 

 

this one involved a first date. it was back when i was a cocktail waitress, working at a hotel, putting myself through school, a single mother, not sleeping a lot, and without much of a nightlife other than work. he was one of our regular customers, friendly, quiet, always alone, polite, settled in his life. a one-beer kind of man. 

on our big night out, we went to dinner and then to my hotel’s employee holiday party. he knew all of the staff and so it was relaxed and easy for both of us. after some socializing, and one or three cocktails, we left for the night,.

 i didn’t know that while we were busy being social inside, the temperature had dropped, and it had gotten icy outside. i was all dressed up in heels and pearls and big hair and skirt, and feeling quite happy and pretty. as we got to the parking lot, i slid on a patch of black ice near the passenger side, and somehow ended up partially beneath his car. he quickly jumped in to help me out from under it, and back up on my feet, and i was absolutely beside myself in tears, not from any injury, but from laughing so hard. and i could not stop laughing, as the only thing hurt was my pride. 

 after looking up at his face, and seeing that he was not laughing along with me, i said, ‘i was just checking your muffler,’ thinking it might help him to  relax into the situation a bit. he just looked back at me with a poker face, asked me if i was okay, quietly opened my door, and helped me into his car. he never even cracked a smile, or made a comment, and instead, acted as if nothing unusual had just happened. he was a ‘perfect gentleman’ by some standards.

 i instantly realized this had been an unexpected gift from the universe, a sort of litmus test of his approach to life and relationships. i knew that we were not a good match. i knew that we lived life differently. i knew that i would smile and say, ‘hi’ when he came in to the hotel the next time, and we would speak nothing of it. i knew why he felt more comfortable being there alone. i knew it was to be our first and last date.

 

 “Some accidents there are in life that a little folly is necessary to help us out of.” – Francois de La Rochefoucauld