Mar12

the bad doctor.

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i went to a new doctor

a specialist with the first available appointment in our medical system

with good reviews

i’ve rarely had anything but positive experiences

 this one was quite the opposite

while he knew his subject

he had absolutely no understanding of human interaction

let alone skills in working with a patient

he was cocky, a know it all

i had to ask him all the relevant questions and tell him my history

as he never asked or offered suggestions

he was dismissive, scoffed at things i said

seemed doubtful that i would even follow through with recommended therapies

at one point

i came close to asking

“are you A.I.?”

even though he was present in the room with me

finally

i had his order for a physical therapist

the outcome i had hoped for

 along with my new massage therapist trainer

no need or plan to see him ever again.

he told me to return after 8 weeks

to see how the treatment was going

as he expected

that i wouldn’t get a p.t. appointment

for at least 2 weeks

what an inspirational guy

why did he ever chose to be a doctor?

as i left

i felt bad for all of the people still in the waiting room

hoping they would see him soon.

—

“the good physician treats the disease; the great physician treats the patient who has the disease.”

-sir william osler, canadian physician and one of the founding professors of Johns Hopkins Hospital

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114 responses »

  1. I used to have a young male doctor in London who never looked away from the computer screen while consulting. He diagnosed and prescribed anything and everything without ever looking at me or properly examining me. I was glad to move away from London and find compassionate and caring doctors here in the countryside.

    Best wishes, Pete.

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  7. Oh how I wanted to click – not like. It made me sad to read this knowing that you had such a bad experience. Do the PT and get stronger and better. Peace

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  8. What an experience, Beth! The question ‘are you A.I.?’ often comes to mind when dealing with doctors, some really just seem to read out a script written by a robot. Better luck with all your future medics!

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  13. I am sorry you had to experience that humility, beth. Unfortunately, there are too many physicians, mostly old White guys, who seem to care only for themselves and little about the patient. I’ve had to vote with my feet, too, in choosing my healthcare providers.

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  14. It’s become so difficult to get into med school, I find that many of the younger doctors have spent years with their noses completely in books. I had a technically excellent but personally lousy primary who I switched from, but finding doctors who are both compassionate and well versed in becoming harder

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  17. My son went to an “AI” specialist – he started talking medical jargon and we both asked him to speak in English – his reply was you need to understand it the way I am saying it! Glad you got what you needed medically, if not bedside mannerly….

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  21. I’m sorry, Beth. This seems to be the way today. I’ve seen many doctors over the last 20 years. The ones who used to be compassionate listeners are no longer. And it seems the only remedy is another medication that causes other symptoms. I’m seeing a functional medicine practitioner this week. Hopefully, she can provide medical guidance that is less harmful and with compassion.

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  24. Oh dear…I hate getting the dismissive vibe from a new provider. Loved your observation about ‘are you real or AI’. Hard to tell, eh? I like what Bruce said below about cherishing the good ones. 🥰

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  26. They need to start focusing on “bed-side-manner” classes. That said, there should be a patient satisfaction survey that is sent to the board of doctors or something. (Not just a Yelp review ;-) )

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    • I agree. at one point I wanted to say that I had developed a new pain since being in this office, a pain in the a&$, but decided to keep that inside until I had my order written for a p.t., who I booked and ia an amazing person and polar opposite of him.

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  30. I’ve encountered a few doctors similar to this, but not quite on the level of the one you saw. I, too, wonder why these individuals become doctors. Yes, they may have the “smarts.” But compassion and communication are necessary, too. I’m sorry you had to deal with this man. I hope you feel better soon.

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    • thanks so much, yes, I’ve dealt with a variety of doctors over the years, and my general doctor is amazing, I’ve had some that were just okay or good, and I think that I’ve never had to deal with someone like this, so I was shocked, plus was in pain, and needed some support and reassurance. why I felt sorry for all of the patients waiting to see him. the good news is that he wrote the order I needed for p.t. and she seems wonderful

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  32. Well, it’s one thing to be a “clinical” dr. unable to really know how to connect with a patient on a personable level but a completely different thing to be a condescending jerk. I’ve been to drs. that yes, were very knowledgeable in their field but really weren’t very warm and fuzzy and that was ok but fortunately I haven’t experienced that kind of arrogance. It’s too bad you couldn’t of given him a tip or two on how not to lose anymore patients but why do a person like that any favors? A glowing review would be just the advice he needs. lol! Chris

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    • I recently heard a fantastic physician speak (online), and he said that most (almost all) patients would not make a lifestyle change after a 10 minute appointment. He said that trust and respect between the patient and the physician must be created and the only way he knows how to do that is to share his time. His appointments are 1 hour long so he can talk to the PERSON and get to know the PERSON. Wow!

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  37. How terrible. Women and medicine. Would he treat a man that way? I doubt it. I’m glad you are never going to see him again. If you can, write a comment on his site to warn others. People do read them. So sorry that happened to you.

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    • all of my docs/healthcare do through our university/hospital system and I’ve never had anything but positive experiences. I love my own doc as well as her nurse practitioners. he was a specialist who I needed a referral from so I’ll never have to see him again, and I received a form from them requisiting a review by the time I got home.

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      • You’re fortunate to have had good experiences in the past. I have been lucky too. So many women are not. 

        Remember Melanie? She was so sick. She went to about 15 different doctors (men and women), and she could not get any help. She ended up telling the doctor/s, “I know I need to lose weight but that’s not what’s wrong with me,” as soon as one walked in, and no one could see past that. She died. They kept asking about her diet and she was in so much pain. She could barely walk ,or use her arms. She was suffering and no one helped her. 

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  41. Now that is a sad experience, Beth. It is hard to believe that he made it through med school without being straightened out by one of his superiors. Some never do learn I guess. Hope you get the help you needed and deserved.

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  42. I have a ‘decent’ personal doctor, a new one when I moved 1-1/2 hours away from where I lived before. My previous doctor was truly one-of-a-kind in bedside manner, and treated our relationship from the onset as though I was in control of my health and she would help me along with things that are important to me. When I wanted to try some non-medication ways to help a problem, she was always fine, gave me some pointers and let me have a go at it. If I wasn’t successful, she would remind me that what I wanted to achieve was difficult, and would tell me to let her know when I was ready for some help in reaching my goal.

    I don’t get much time now in an appointment, after reviewing blood work that is done between visits, to ask questions or talk about what is the current status on some of the things I am trying medication for. But at least this one listens to my concerns and doesn’t ignore me, as did her colleague one time I had to see him. The office staff knows now to NEVER give me an appointment with him!

    Good luck with your PT! 

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    • that is so frustrating, and I have a really good personal doctor so I feel lucky for that. most doctors I’ve encountered have seemed to be good people, this one was such a surprise for me

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  44. A sad commentary about our health care system in the US these days but I have to say some places are better than others. I am fortunate that I live in one of the better. They try hard but having said that, I too have seen the type you’ve experienced, sadly, and I never went back. A big city doctor. Good luck with your next.

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  46. My upbringing — “always be polite” — would have kept me quiet in the moment, but that guy should never be allowed to see patients. I’d not only never return, I’d have looked for places to leave negative reviews and warnings. I revere doctors (my dad was a beloved physician in our city) but bad ones really set me off!

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    • he is a doc within my medical system attached to our university and hospital and I have left him a review and a half. at least a got the pt order from him and the one I chose is wonderful! all of my other docs in my experience have been good or great, I was really caught off guard!

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