grandbabies make homemade pretzels for mom and dad running marathon, even while nourishing themselves
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Multitasking? I can’t even do two things at once. I can’t even do one thing at once. |
Oct26
Tag Archives: humor
Oct24
a boy, a leaf, and a vision
loved our leaf man project. read the book to the kindergarten, they then created their own leaf art. we found out 2nd grade also read the book and created their own version of leaf art. the kinders created all kinds of cute pieces: cows, butterflies, and leaf men. after, we took a trip across the school to see what the 2nd grade had done. all kinds of cute pieces once again: leaf babies, leaf fairies, and then there was one – done by a little boy who had his own idea of what art is.
cute kinder projects
cute 2nd grade projects
and then of course, you have the scarlet johanson leaf project
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If art is to nourish the roots of our culture, society must set the artist free to follow his vision wherever it takes him.
Oct21
the cat came back. and just won’t go away. and is still coming back.
a few years back, when he was still a wee lad, grandbaby m came all the way from australia to visit for the holidays. we bought a crazy pile of used toys for him to play with, knowing he’d have to leave most of them behind, and planned to donate them back for other kids to enjoy, upon his return home. he was very fascinated by animals – cats in particular, at this stage of his life. while here, he played with real cats, and halloween cats, and we bought him knit cats, cloth cats, stuffed cats, and then – the mechanical cat.
imagine our surprise, after we purchased this cat, when we discovered, it was just not an ordinary stuffed cat, but it had a place for batteries inside it’s belly, hidden under it’s mangy, ratted, orange fur. m took to this cat immediately, and loved to sit with it and play with it and carry it around. the adults, on the other hand, began to become a bit freaked out by it the longer it was around. it had a peculiar habit of moving once in a while, in no particular interval of time, and quite often, it seemed to turn it’s creepy head and stare right at us. (chucky’s feline counterpart in my opinion).
we were all a bit relieved and happy when he took to this creature, figuring it would be traveling home down under with him, never to cross our paths again. imagine our surprise once more, when we discovered they had left it behind, hidden in the house for us to find. we put it back out for a while, under the tree, as it continued to move at will and make eye contact with us from time to time. once the holidays were over, i thought it might be funny to pack it up and bring it out at christmas the next year. i packed it up with the other holiday stuff and forgot about it.
when the next year came, i wrapped it up and offered it as my ‘white elephant’ gift, one that some innocent family member would receive as a lucky surprise. another daughter chose this package, and not knowing, opened it, and there was a collective gasp from the group, as everyone remembered it from the year before. she was a good sport and reluctantly kept it for the year, only to do the same thing to some other unsuspecting relative at our next christmas celebration.
each year now, as is our new tradition, the person who ‘won’ it the year before, brings it back, elaborately wrapped and disguised, waiting to pass it on. each person reports that it does odd and creepy things when they have it – moving at will, making rustling sounds at night, and of course, the staring. each person has used their own strategy to deal with it. one combed its hair out, – trying to get on its good side, some have hidden it, left it in the box, or taken its batteries out. each year, it comes back, rattier, and mangier, and shows its age a bit more, yet it still instills a bit of illogical terror in all of us. this year, it could come back wrapped in a flat-screen tv box, or in a beautiful gift bag, just biding its time, until it once again goes home with someone – and it waits quietly for someone to forget and open it, the year’s winner.
Oct21
i have no words. oh, i do have one – gigil.
owlet
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Gigil (Tagalog): The urge to pinch or squeeze something that is unbearably cute.
Prononciation: Ghee-gill
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image credit: huffington post
Oct20
shopping, hopping , then dropping
part of my family was visiting from nyc and this time they rented a car and drove here instead of flying. we took the rare opportunity to shop for large items they would never be able to haul home normally, with a ‘quick visit to ikea.’ this concept of the ‘quick visit’ to this crazy grand canyon of a place, was soon revealed to be the ultimate oxymoron, in my young niece’s opinion. she dealt with it all in her own way.
she finds a kindred spirit in an employee who has her own stuffed animal and happily joins in play with her stuffed bunny and ratty friends
she relaxes a bit at the scene of all the play, with her favorite color plastic ikea shopping bag, as her blanket
we move to another part of the store, but it’s all just one great napping place in her eyes
soon, she is absolutely at her limit, and ready to roll on out of this place. disguising herself as a large carton of furniture, she is in full-out camouflage mode.
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‘And then, I do love my shopping, but actually, lounging is the big thing.’
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Oct19
why i am still single #7
and the online dating prospects continue…. (this one was quite a challenge for me not to follow up on, as he clearly knows what he does and does not want )
A little about me…
I worked for 15 years and my position was cut. I am not a lazy person but like to relax.
I don’t need a pen pal. I think after one week of writing each other we should meet in person and see if we are going to go our separate ways.
About the one I’m looking for…
I am looking for someone that likes to go up north in a small town doing nothing but have fun.
I’d just like to add…
If your picture is not recent please do not contact me. I am not looking for anyone older than 54. I am not into long distance relationships that will lead to nothing but phone sex. If I wanted a female pen pal I would write to a prison inmate. I am not prejudice.
Oct17
summertime….when the sleeping is uneasy.
just as they had many times before, p and her husband s, hit the road and made the journey from detroit to chicago to visit their grown children. they decided to take their time and spend the night along the way, as they were taking their older beloved dog with them, and wanted to make it an easy trip for him.
it was the long easter weekend, and they booked the only ‘dog-friendly lodging’ available, a chain motel, at their target stopping point – michigan city, indiana. this town, once known as ‘the coho capital of the world,‘ is now best known for its outlet malls, casino, and state prison. nyc it is not, but it happened to be located in just the right spot, the halfway point of the trip. they were fine with all this as it was just for a night, and in the morning they’d be off and on the road once again, headed for the windy city.
upon arriving at the motel, they checked in at the little front office, and made their way around the back to find their room and settle for the night. once in back, the first thing they noticed was the location of their room, and the second thing they noticed were the police officers, guns drawn, in defensive stance, aiming their weapons towards the room right next to theirs, involved in a standoff with the current resident. as p’s blood pressure quickly began to rise, s calmly put down his window to ask one of the officers if there was a problem, and if could they come through to get into their room. the dog now had his head out the window too, checking out the action and trying to figure out what was going on. while the officer was dumbfounded, by this request, p’s reaction was swift and strong -‘are you &^%$#@ kidding me?!?! put those windows up and let’s get the %$*& out of here and back to that office!’
s and the dog knew better than to mess with p when she started using symbols in her sentences, and they quickly backed out and returned to the office. when they asked the desk clerk what was going on, he looked at them calmly, saying,’i can’t tell you that.’ knowing there was nothing else available, they had no choice but to take a room, ‘as far away from the guns as possible.’ they didn’t sleep real well that night, but they never heard shots, and there is always something to be said for that. the next morning, they awoke early and headed out towards chicago, happy to be away from whatever had been going on.
chicago was great, the family visit was a good one, and all worries were behind them, as they headed for home. it was late afternoon when a light on their dash suddenly lit up, signaling a problem with the tire pressure. they pulled into the closest gas station and as they checked the tire that looked a bit low, it quickly went completely flat. a guy at the station replaced it with the donut tire and advised them not to drive more than 20 miles on it. it was easter sunday and nothing was open, so once again they ended up at their favorite motel, and requested their ‘usual room’ from the other night. the clerk seemed as surprised to see them as they were to see him.
they got the key and drove to their room, happy no standoffs were in play, and no swat vehicles were parked in the lot next to them. once inside, p went to take a shower, and noticed the shower curtain was missing. now, they’d been in this same room just 2 nights before, and the curtain had been in its place on the rod, so they wondered what possibly could have happened to it, as it was not the usual thing that someone would steal from a hotel room to take home with them.
s and the dog returned to the office, explained the situation to the clerk, who responded in his usual stoic manner, ‘hmm, i can’t say where it might be, but just take the one from the room next to you, the door’s unlocked.’ he truly is a corporate policy man and problem solver who can think on his toes. they trudged back to the room next to theirs, took down the curtain and installed it in their room’s shower. p was at her limit at this point, took her shower and they didn’t discuss it after that. later that night, when all were about to drift off into another restless sleep, they had to wonder if the missing shower curtain was somehow connected to the standoff, and perhaps even wondered what could have been wrapped in it? as for me, i wonder if they’ll return for their anniversary each year, though i think not.
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This is an elegant hotel! Room service has an unlisted number.
Oct7
how the government shutdown and dominoes led to a ruined big night in for my friend in 10 easy steps.
1. friend’s husband signs up for long distance marathon and has to spend the night before it, on site. he is happy.
2. friend’s friend invites their kids to have a slumber party with her kids that night at her house. both sets of kids are happy.
3. friend is extremely excited to have an very rare night at home all to herself, not taking care of anyone else. she is happy.
4. friend making plans to pamper herself and do only things she most enjoys. she is very happy.
5. two american government parties disagree on things. they are not happy.
6. both sides play chicken and no one gives in and they find themselves at an impasse. they are even less happy.
7. government shuts down. each side is blaming the other one for their unhappiness.
8. national parks shut down. rangers and visitors are not happy.
9. friend’s husband’s marathon at national park is shutdown. he is not happy.
10. friend’s night of self-indulgence is shutdown. she is not happy.
‘it’s like the first domino falling’ – zhang jiankang
Oct6
how i spend my weekends?
fellow blogger friend and humorist, tom nardone, http://tomnardone.net/home/ posted a spaghetti western/clint eastwood-style piece. told him i wanted to get in on that and be a free-wheelin’ wild woman, meting out justice all over the land. tom is a man who dealt with a lot of injustice as a child, and lived to write about it. he now helps others with his honest childhood stories and his comical approach to life as an adult. well lo and behold, he made my justice fighter dream come true. here is tom’s version of what i am doing with my time off when i’m not teaching kindergarten. thank you tom.
Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen. Michael Jordan
Sep29
and then…….!
a day of ups and downs and ups again. began with the farmer’s market – flowers, fruits, veggies, jams, babies finding music there and dancing to live strings as the sun gleamed down. and then…. a car surprise – went from oil change in 15 minutes and 19 dollars, to front suspension in 2.5 hours and 838 dollars. threw in a free light bulb. and then…..thai dinner – hot spicy fun and laughter and burning lips with friends, including our volleyball player in a cast ‘with a slight break/chip’. and then……ran into aut/out-fest, filled with rainbows, beads, italian ices and drag queens. and then…..wandered into a wedding back at the scene of the morning farmers market, more music and beauty everywhere. and then… a bicycle built for 7. full circle. and then…….
But then there are magical, beautiful things in the world.
There’s incredible acts of kindness and bravery, and in the most unlikely places, and it gives you hope.
I didn't have my glasses on.... 