Tag Archives: technology

less not more.

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i wish this option was available.

after noticing that my bill had made a huge monthly rate leap

it was time for yet another wacky interaction with my cable provider

the rep was very friendly as he told me

that my old rate was purely promotional

 it had expired without notice

and was no longer available

i then told him that in that case

i’d like to cut back on my service

to restore it to a more reasonable (yet still crazy) rate

he offered to get right to work for me

to find a happy solution to my problem

after thanking me often

during my 37 minutes of insane hold music

my rep came up with my new rate

 i laughed out loud when he quoted me a price

that was actually higher than the one

i was calling about when we began

 he quickly and politely explained

that he had provided me with their premier package

adding in home security, a landline, voice controls,

and i think something to do with walking my cat

(none of which i requested)

 he also told me that he had used

their new state of the art billing service

(why it took so long)

which is very finely tuned

to review my bill and only charge me

based on the channels and services i use

offering me the best possible deal available

i reminded him that i had actually called

to eliminate channels and extra services

and to pay less not more

he politely went back to work on my issue

after a lot more hold music

i eliminated my useless channels and services

declining the best deal in the universe

even after he warned me i would be giving up things such as:

the rodeo clown channel, the quilting channel, and the watching paint dry live channel

i held my ground

and finally

in a twist of fate and luck and cable math

i somehow ended up back at

the special no longer available promotional rate

that i had requested to return to when we started .

“the real problem is not whether machines think but whether men do.”

-b. f. skinner 

 

 

 

image credit: gadgetpage.info

amy’s choice.

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oh, amy what have you done?

after a bit of an unexplained absence

and when rejoining us outside at her picnic

amy tells us that she was busy inside

setting her mother up with her old iPad

and is already feeling a bit of remorse and worry

that this choice may have created

a life-long need for her tech support

and round-the-clock calls to her

yearning for immediate answers

to the endless questions as to the subtleties and mysteries

contained within the world of apple products.

her brother quickly makes it clear

that he is hands-off

and is not in any way involved in this endeavor.

she speaks openly of her fear

while the only other things we know

that she is afraid of are mascots

though this new level of fear

may have even topped that.

we all reassure her that she is a good daughter for having done this

while at the same time privately harboring

our own personal doubts

about the potential risk/reward factor involved in her choice.

about 3 minutes went by

and this is a picture of amy re-entering her house

after she has been called in

to where her mother sits with her new iPad

and her first ‘question/glitch.’

she looks frightened and unsure of what awaits her inside.

 

“choices are the hinges of destiny.”

-edwin markham

 

weather.

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kind of funny

that the weather channel on tv

that was supposed to warn me

about incoming dangerous storms

wasn’t working right

because of the incoming dangerous storms.

every so often

a word like ‘severe’ would pop up

and disappear back into the screen

hope it wasn’t saying,

‘turn this off and take cover immediately!’

or

‘if you can see this, you are in harm’s way!’

at least i lived to tell the tale

and that is still working for me. 

“weather forecast for tonight: dark.”

-george carlin

last days.

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“your modem has seen its last days.”

these are the words

that two different

comcast/xfinity customer service phone helper elves

uttered to me

when i read them the 267 digits and a couple of random letters

imprinted on the back of my modem

and described

what it was/was not doing

is this grim prognosis part of the script?

we then went through

a series of modem exercises

as a last ditch effort

to try to revive it

all were hit or miss

all to no avail

until it was confirmed

at last

that it had indeed

passed on

so

 we scheduled an appointment

to have an elf come and remove the old one

to replace it with

a new, younger and more glamorous model

though we had no history

and i feared it would never be the same.

“technological progress has merely provided us with more efficient means for going backwards.”

-aldous huxley