what a long and wild ride

 asked one of my daughters

to help me to figure out

why one of my streaming channels

was only displaying a black screen with red letters

had been doing it for a few weeks

no way to sign in or out no picture no sound

i’d followed all instructions/suggestions offered online

tech is not my superpower and likely my kryptonite

what ensued over the next hour plus

is  hard to explain

 we worked together

 two phones, emails, calls, listening, explaining

responding to texts, laptop, user names, model number

entering codes, serial numbers, passwords,

which phone number, whose name

turn things off, turn things on, unplug, count

shut everything down, find a secret button

reset the wifi reset the wifi reset the wifi

go up down left right with my remote

with just the right number and pattern

of ups, downs, and overs

so many different dance steps and people involved

 trying to solve this problem

 our phone calls

required us to do battle with AI

to override it

insist again and again

to speak with a live human

‘you do not have to worry’

kept getting crazier and crazier

funnier and funnier

tried really hard not to laugh out loud

i started taking messy notes

quotes from the live humans

questions arose

still just black and red?

roku, tcl, netflix, sling?

what/who is causing the issue?

is it me? is it you?

still just black and red?

what is firmware?

there’s really a secret button?

where do i find that?

still just black and red?

yes, still just black and red

what is she asking us to do?

what do you see now?

did it work?

still just black and red?

is this the model number of serial number?

is it 8325 or S325?

what?!

comments

numbers

moments of disbelief

drew a system of arrows

to illustrate

what we were

asked to do with the remote

 it struck me

as a possible absurd long game tech prank

in the end

they decided it was my tv

not them

who were to blame

began a whole new cycle

of instructions/possible solutions

final solution

they had to remotely

factory reset my entire tv

 got my one channel back

still just black and red?

no, not still just black and red

i now have to reset

every app/channel on my tv

i’ve decided to

add one a day

back into the mix

after

thanking my daughter

for riding along

on this bumpy twisty road with me.

‘any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.’

*arthur c. clark

*Sir Arthur Charles Clarke ( 1917- 2008) was an English  science fiction writer, inventor, undersea explorer and TV series host.He popularized space travel and wrote many books and magazine  essays. In 1961, he received the Kalinga Prize, a Unesco award for popularizing science. Clarke’s science and science fiction writings earned him the nickname “Prophet of the Space Age.” His sci-fi writings also earned him a number of Hugo and Nebula awards, and he became one of the leading figures of the genre. Clarke co-wrote the screenplay for the 1968 film 2001: A Space Odyssey, regarded as one of the most influential films of all time.