Category Archives: medical

Mar12

the bad doctor.

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i went to a new doctor

a specialist with the first available appointment in our medical system

with good reviews

i’ve rarely had anything but positive experiences

 this one was quite the opposite

while he knew his subject

he had absolutely no understanding of human interaction

let alone skills in working with a patient

he was cocky, a know it all

i had to ask him all the relevant questions and tell him my history

as he never asked or offered suggestions

he was dismissive, scoffed at things i said

seemed doubtful that i would even follow through with recommended therapies

at one point

i came close to asking

“are you A.I.?”

even though he was present in the room with me

finally

i had his order for a physical therapist

the outcome i had hoped for

 along with my new massage therapist trainer

no need or plan to see him ever again.

he told me to return after 8 weeks

to see how the treatment was going

as he expected

that i wouldn’t get a p.t. appointment

for at least 2 weeks

what an inspirational guy

why did he ever chose to be a doctor?

as i left

i felt bad for all of the people still in the waiting room

hoping they would see him soon.

—

“the good physician treats the disease; the great physician treats the patient who has the disease.”

-sir william osler, canadian physician and one of the founding professors of Johns Hopkins Hospital

Dec29

boring.

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the doctor asked me

the usual litany of questions

general health, lifestyle, habits, history, medical issues

she was excited to find that i was not on any medication

her happiness continued on through the list of ‘red flag’ questions

as i answered no, no, no, rarely, on special occasions, safely, long ago

 heard myself reciting my answers

finally blurted out that i must be really boring

 she told me that is exactly what doctors want to hear

i made her day, but now i’m left wondering how to kick it up a notch. 

—

“everybody’s life can be a movie but most of such movies will be boring!”

-mehmet murat ildan

 

 

 

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image credit: google images

Aug13

choices.

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“we are our choices.”

-jean-paul sartre

 

 

 

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image credit: new yorker cartoons – roz chast

Nov7

not exactly.

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imagine my surprise

just before undergoing

an out-patient medical test

listening to the waiver

read aloud to me

most of it

consisting of the usual

risks, percentages, side effects

 somewhere in the middle

i heard:

“medicine is not an exact science.”

best liability statement i have ever heard.

 

—

“i am dying from the treatment of too many physicians.”

-alexander the great

 

 

 

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image credit: aspca.org

Aug8

glitter again/still.

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i went to the u of m dermo clinic

for my annual skin checkup

and remembered

just how thorough they were

when 3 different docs

checked me out. 

the first one asked,

“did you know that you have some glitter stuck to your back?’

the second one asked,

“how did you get glitter in your hair?”

and finally, the third, the resident doc asked,

“did you know that you have glitter on your feet?”

i think they all imagined that i’d been to a wild party

or secretly am a dancer as my second job

i really couldn’t attribute it to working with the kinders

now that it’s summer break.

i  told all of them that i wasn’t really surprised

that it’s always on me somewhere

thanked them for letting me know

and for another clean bill of health.

i think it lightened things up a bit in their clinic. 

—

“i must bridge the gap

between adolescent glitter and mature glow.”

-sylvia plath

 

 

 

 

 

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image credit: instyle