Tag Archives: keys

scream.

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my key fob missing its insides and screaming.

me looking for the insides of my key fob and screaming.

went to have coffee with my friend

locked up my car

put my key in my pocket

when i returned to the car

all i had left of my electronic key

was the empty screaming shell pictured above 

insides were nowhere to be found 

used the key/shell in the car door 

and the panic button screamed nonstop

with no electronics to turn it off

 until my car started

each and every time

a bit dumbfounded

as key fob was still in one piece

in my pocket

found a tiny screw missing in back

somehow it had

unscrewed itself

fallen out

opened itself up 

insides popped out

closed itself back up

and was empty 

like it never happened

interesting scenario

luckily i have daughters

with my keys all over the place

and my car has stopped screaming 

but my old key fob still looks upset. 


“the universe is like a safe to which there is a combination.

but the combination is locked up in the safe.”

-peter de vrie

credit: edvard munch – the scream

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i feel like i am diagonally parked in a parallel universe. ~author unknown

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welcome-1

the email came

guess-timating

how many miles

i had on my car

 they were spot on

within 200 miles

inviting me in

for an oil change

a winterizing

a check up

asking

would you like coffee

will you need wi-fi

a ride home

a loaner

or

spend time here with us

while we

pamper your car

and you

and

i was half expecting

 a massage

 a mani/pedi

i took

the earliest appointment

on my day off

with plans

to head off

to do all the things

i’d been wanting to do

i drove up

and

the door opened for my car

welcoming me in

to the dealership

with a warm embrace

and they asked what they could do

 took me to the comforting area to wait

gave me coffee

and

wi-fi

and

cable

and

magazines

and

cushiony chairs

and

the company of just one other

pampered customer

a man of about my age

and we each

went about our morning

waiting in comfort

until

they realized

his car

was going to take too long

 so he took a rental

and

headed out

  half an hour

later

 the service advisor

came

 knelt down by my chair

i felt

there was possibly

a bit of bad news coming

 she

whispered

i don’t know how this happened

 i looked at her

as she said

that man

who was sitting here with you

has just left with your keys

 we don’t know why

this has never happened

ever

in the history

of our dealership

and

we can’t

get ahold of him

i’m so sorry

we’re not sure

why he’d take your keys

since he was taking a rental

 even if

he thought those were his keys

we’d need them to work on his car

that he left behind

slate.com

we just can’t understand it

we apologize

we can drive you

all of the places you need to go

or

give you a loaner

and

when we get your keys back

 we will

we’ll deliver your car

with your keys

to your house

or

you can wait a bit

and

see what happens

with more coffee

i chose

the waiting option

and

i do enjoy my subaru family

but really didn’t want to

spend the whole day with them

 doing errands

having lunch

and

i wanted to see

what would happen

why

he was not answering

his phone

his email

the texts

i wanted

to know

his story

 i imagined him

working out with at my gym

using the id on my keys

then at my house

dancing with nacho the cat and his cat friends

daily mail.co.uk

and

drinking a glass of my pinot noir

 reading my magazines

listening to my music

while taking a bubble bath

in my tub

getty images

and

they came in again

 said they still

couldn’t reach him

do you want to wait

with

more coffee

more comfort

 a while later

he called

 said he had no idea

why he took the keys

and

he didn’t

want to see me

but

apologized profusely

and

came back

and

they pulled up my car at last

washed

all free service

apologies

thank you’s

for

being understanding

no explanation

and

the wish for a good day

and i was off

once again

wondering

would the tub be drained

when i finally got home?

2a0e68703df592fbea0c3d26ceb8de93

one cannot plan for the unexpected.
– aaron klug

images courtesy of: google images